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Cubs Karma

Don’t relax.
Don’t ease off a bit.
Don’t rest on your laurels.
Don’t start looking forward to the playoffs.
Don’t take anything for granted.
Take deep breathes.
Focus your energy and perform within yourself.
We are in a pennant race and its going to take your best effort to pull this one out.


This advice is not directed at the Cubs players, coaches or management. This is for you, the fan.

You matter.

Yes, you. Your actions, your knowledge, your thoughts, and your beliefs all have a direct effect on the Chicago Cubs and their chances of getting into the playoffs and yes, winning a World Series.


It’s called Cubs Karma. Don’t beat yourself up about the little drought we’ve had between championships, there’s a lot about Cubs Karma that we don’t know. This is what we do know:

Cubs Karma is not a religious belief system, hypothetical theorem or ultra slick lounge bar on Clark Street.

Cubs Karma is a barely visible, hyper-kinetic mass that hovers over most of the continental United States. Cubs Karma is sort of like the Ozone layer but more important.

Cubs Karma comes in two forms, positive and negative. Positive karma reduces the number of years until the Cubs win a World Series, negative increase the number of years until we raise a championship banner on the north side.


Only Cub Fans can add or detract to the sum total of Cubs Karma, here are the details of how your actions effect Cubs Karma.

Negative Karma:

  • Letting an opposing fan go un-heckled
  • Complaining about the cold
  • Ordering a margarita
  • Booing the Cubs, unless obviously deserved
  • Doing the Wave
  • Thunder sticks, stay away from thunder sticks
  • Suggesting that you care about the team on the south side
  • Reading or writing articles by John Kass or other Cubs hating journalists that are really just upset that their newspaper company won't exist soon.
  • Rally Monkeys
  • Drinking the blood of new born Eskimo's when it’s not a full moon

Positive Karma

  • Always take Cubs tickets when offered
  • Always get a few extra beers at last call
  • Don't leave the game early
  • Explain to opposing players the numerous reasons why they should not reproduce
  • Heckling the opposing team with timely humor
  • Don't go home after a game until you've visited at least 3 bars
  • Sing ‘Take Me Out to the Ballgame’ at the appropriate time
  • Always know the inning/score; know the count more that 50% of the time
  • Always give caught foul balls to kids sitting near you
  • Always be able to name at least 2 random Cubs from the 80's and 90's (see: Frank DiPino and Derrick May)
  • Rally Hats

Go forth and make the best of your opportunity to bring unshackled joy and raw jubilation to our tortured fan base.

(Just kidding about the Eskimo blood, drink up whenever you need that extra boost, regardless of lunar phase)


Listed below are links to weblogs that reference Cubs Karma:

» Zambrano's No Hitter: An Eyewitness Account from Tortured Fan Base
The Prelude On Saturday night at approximately 9:21pm I received the news from frantic Cubs Fan #43 that hurricane Ike had relocated the Cubs vs Houston game to Miller Park. "Cubs are playing tomorrow night and Monday in Milwaukee. Road... [Read More]


This page contains an article posted on September 26, 2007 11:53 PM.

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